Guns and Overcoming Fear (and Stupid)

I am afraid of guns. There I said it. I am not proud of the fact that I am afraid but I just am. My fear doesn't come from some kind of personal trauma but more the kind that comes from the unknown.  After contemplating my fear and the root of the issue, I believe that I am afraid of not knowing how to use a gun, God forbid, I ever need to use a gun. You see, I have a gun in my home. I can't tell you if it's loaded or if the safety is on. I can't even tell you where the key is to unlock the box it is in.  Now, that's just stupid and I don't do stupid.

So this is what I did to overcome stupid.


I signed up for their Women Only Training Class. Fourteen women came together to learn. Some had their own guns & ammunition, some (like me) rented everything. Some of the women had handled a gun before, others (like me) had not.


We spent 45 minutes in a class environment. We learned safety. We learned how to grip a gun.


We learned how to stand with a gun.


We learned how to load a gun.


We asked questions. We laughed.  I wanted to cry. Seriously, I was that afraid.


The next half of the class was spent at the indoor range. I wanted to leave. I was sweating. I wore platform pumps and had this really big ring on my finger. What was I thinking? I was miserable.

It took me a moment before I could pull the trigger. I hate the element of surprise and I was anticipating the gun to act violently towards me. I did not want it to be loud.  I did not want to look stupid.

I did it. I pulled the trigger and then again and again.  Was it my Laura Croft moment? No. Did I start singing some AC/DC song in my head because I was a re-born bad-ass? No.

When the night was finally over, I spent a few moments in my car reflecting. I was proud of myself and I was going to continue with my training until I was comfortable.


Just a note: This is not a post on politics, ethics, religion or whatever soapbox you would like to stand on.  This is a post about an incredible company (360 Tactical), that is run by an incredible staff (thank you Justin). This is a post about me.  This is a post encouraging you to overcome fear & stupid, whatever your fear & stupid might be.

I will write a part 2 next week.  Max rocked the Zombie Clowns!


mysteryhistorymom said...

I am so proud of you. I need to do this! You ROCK. Lori

Byron Bright said...

I am proud of you babe! You did that all on your own! People take note...that's at least 14 women armed! Don't mess with Texas.

sarah said...

You are awesome!!! This makes me want to do this! My hubby has been begging me for years to take a class with him... I won't tell him it was you that convinced me- I'll let him think it was me finally caving into his idea. ;) It'll be our secret. :)

Chris Kauffman said...

Wow scary to me too , I've never even seen a hand gun in my life other than on an officer , we don't really have guns much here maybe in the country and those would be rifles , good for you tackling a fear like that , be safe .

Julie said...

I took gun courses with an ex who wanted to be a cop. In our state, we are allowed to take concealed carry classes now and carry a gun. But I'm afraid to get one. I'm not scared of the gun, necessarily. But I'm scared of the need to use it. Once you pull a gun out, you have to be prepared to use it .... and possibly kill someone ... and I'm scared that even if I'm justified in using it, the burden of guilt that killing someone else would place on my conscience would simply be too much for me. But I still keep thinking about buying one, getting the permit, and carrying one. I live in the city, and there are lots of bad guys who wouldn't think twice about shooting ME over $20 (which is usually the most amount of cash I carry). I'd rather the shootee be one of them than me, but still ... I think I'd rather move than feel as though I have to carry a gun to feel safe.

Unknown said...

Sometimes it's a good thing to leave our comfort zone. I'm proud of you : o )

Tiffany said...

Um, I'm scared just reading this post and seeing the pictures, then the video of Max...heart attack! lol. But good for you! I'm still not brave enough.

elizabeth said...

you are brave -
I am deathly afraid of the water and drowning -
{ almost drowned 2x as a kid}
yet I am not as brave as you - tried taking swimming lessons - I just cant do it
another reason you are the best !!!
B said he'll shoot with you whenever you like!

Gail Griner Golden at Gail-Friends said...

Good for you! I'm looking forward to part 2.

Marie said...

Congratulations on doing something that can be very daunting to us women.

Kat said...

I just found your blog today and am reading thru your posts. I wanted to stop and tell you that I'm proud of you for taking this class! We've had guns in our house for a while, and my DH actually bought one for me. I had fired it, but wasn't comfortable with it, so I took a similar class offered by our local Sheriff's office. I will never regret doing that and strongly encourage anyone that is new to handguns to do so. DH said that he could teach me, but I learned so much more, without the pressure that comes with one spouse trying to teach the other something new.

Anonymous said...

That's wonderful! Thank you for posting this! I'll be taking that class tonight.